Category Archives: Moss Bureau

Two Gentlemen at Rizzoli

riz11 Here we are at the Rizzoli bookstore having a “conversation”, just like we have every day all day long for the past forty six years. Except this time there were a hundred people listening. Oh, we were talking about the book, Please Do Not Touch, which you yourself can buy and read if you click on the pics, which will take you to Amazon where you can Prime yourself a copy. We ourselves encourage you to do that because otherwise we’ll need to do more public conversations.

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Headline change for the print edition

markdownA more congenial headline for the At Home With… article when it appeared in the print edition of the Times yesterday. Click on us to see the full article. PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH is doing well, even a Best Seller in one category on AMAZON. Zoom Zoom.

 

Please Do Not Touch the NY Times

kanyeJust in time for the book’s first day of sales, here’s a piece in the New York Times today. We ourself might have gone with a different headline, but I guess it gets attention. There’s nothing like plopping yourself down into the middle of pop culture. The book is nesting out the door. Get yours before it’s gone. You don’t want to be last on your block. Click on the pic for the full Times piece.

Tomorrow! Tomorrow! Our book’ll be out tomorrow.

annieEveryone’s excited, that’s for sure. Even some living people. Even people not related to us! Get your red-hot copy right now before James Comey screws everything up. Click on the book to go the PDNT website where you can find out where to get yours and watch the award-winning trailers. Don’t get left out in the cold. Only one more day until TOMORROW, TOMORROW!

please do not touch, book signing

RIZZ INVITEPublication date is Tuesday April 10, which is when those of you wise enough and worried enough to plan ahead and pre-order your copy of our brilliant book about MOSS will be getting your books sent to you. Everyone here applauds your forethought and quick movements. Hear that? Okay, thanks guys. You can stop now. Anyway, this is a notice about the next step in the unleashing upon the world of our book.  A “conversation” between Murray and Franklin AND an opportunity to yes buy the book and then have it signed by us. Yes, both of us. I realize most of you do not have a clue what you’ll be doing on Monday April 23rd. So if you find yourself out and about, come on over to Rizzoli. Hilarity will reign. Click on the book to go to the book website for all kinds of things you’ll be happy to find.

 

Please Do Not Touch, the book

redt-shirtgraphicxx

Our about to be immensely popular new book, with the same title as the t-shirt, will be released on April 10th by Rizzoli.  It will probably sell out in one day. Look at what happened to Fire and Fury. Of course, our book is not about Trump. Though it does have some pretty juicy revelations. It’s the story of MOSS, like you never heard it before. And speaking of Trump, did you know he NEVER shopped at MOSS? Unless it was him who broke in that night and stole the bicycle. I wouldn’t put it past him. Anyway, click on the shirt to go to the special Please Do Not Touch website where you can learn everything you need to know, including that you should pre-order from Amazon. It’s better to be safe than sorry, my grandmother always said. She always pre-ordered. And no, you cannot buy that t-shirt. It’s sold out. Let that be a lesson to you.

 

Advance copies out to reviewers

cover22It does finally seem to be happening, the release of our book. Scheduled for April 10, but last week the advance copies arrived. What this means is that a box of books arrived by FedEx ahead of all the others which are on a ship somewhere. Design-obsessed Somali pirates take note. We are wore out handling the thousands of pre-launch demands for interviews and photo sessions. Okay, maybe not thousands. Okay, two. But they were long, okay? It seemed like more. You can click on the book and be whisked over to Amazon where you can preorder and have it delivered to your door rather than have to go out in the fourth or fifth bombogalactic winter storm which are no doubt waiting around the corner.

Baby Jesus Barbie. Supplies are dwindling fast.

dollNo, we are not at an Amazon Warehouse on Cyber Monday, my friends. We are back in time to 1954 and photographer Massimo Ascani shot this for United Press Photo and it’s called, for some reason, “A Part of Christmas”. You can find this and many other excellent examples of compelling and disturbing vintage press photographs just waiting for you at Torpedo.House. I’ll bet you know exactly who this shot would be perfect for. As a little going away gift.

“You can’t abdicate and eat it, too”

duke and duck

So we watched a documentary on Netflix that claimed that Wallis actually said that to Edward. Who knew she was funny? Nazi, yes. Funny, no. This lovely portrait of the two royal Nazi sympathizers is part of the Tertium Quid collection and is available for purchase as of this very moment, right on our new website Torpedo House, which you should go see even if you don’t like the Royals or the Nazis or silver teapots. It’s all about expanding your worldview. Incidentally, Edward was quite the moron, it turns out, and Wallis was awful in too many ways to count. Click on her round smug little face for transport to Torpedo.House. You’ll land in Tertium Quid. Scroll down.

WWW.TORPEDO.HOUSE is online

balake.jpgIt’s the only red house gallery in the world. Okay, in the United States. Oh my god, all right, in Connecticut. Anyway, it’s private and by appointment and filled with wonder and dustfree and no, you can’t bring your dog, and yes, you can buy things. In fact, that’s the point. If you go to the website now, you can see the sort of things you can buy, and the amazing thing is you don’t even have to come all the way to TORPEDO HOUSE to make a purchase. You can do it from your sofa. Not online, though. You can communicate with us through the website and we will do it all the old-fashioned way. By email. Or the prehistoric way. Telephone. Anyway, you know what they say about torpedos.