TRUMP TOWER BURNS

trumtowergoneTrump himself was rumored to have been seen roaming around the lobby distractedly, muttering that Sloppy Steve had set the fire. He was wearing a torn and soot-covered  bathrobe and carrying a large red button with the word “NUCLEAR” printed on it. Due to fast action by the New York Fire Department, no one was hurt, though it’s obvious the building is now uninhabitable and will need to be torn down. It’s also rumored that the Kushner family real estate company is negotiating for the property where they plan to build a “Maryland-style” housing complex funded by the Israeli government.

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